Toby Penty: ‘If I Lost… the Thoughts Were Really Dark’
In Part 2 of this two-part interview, Toby Penty talks about the emotional challenges arising out of alopecia, and how he was able to overcome them and play at a high level.
· DEV SUKUMAR
The alopecia set in during the prime of your badminton career. So how difficult were the moments before you stepped on court for your matches – did this weigh you down?
Yeah, it was a big challenge. Like the first year and before COVID and just after COVID I found it really difficult. When I look back I actually did a lot better with it at the time than I thought I did. I was still playing an okay level. I think I was really building some momentum to get to that next level on the World Tour, the top 32. I wasn’t miles away and then this came along and it kind of stopped that progression. I think I dealt with it as best I could but it was it was very difficult in those moments before matches, during matches and after matches. I was having such a tough time off the court that winning or losing became such a bigger thing as well. Getting a win was a good feeling because I wasn’t getting many other good feelings outside of that. When it happened the other way and I lost I was I was in such a bad place during the first year or two. If I lost the match some of the thoughts were really dark and challenging. I’m just glad over time I’ve been able to work through that, and it’s not as much life or death. If anything, when the big moments came, especially towards the end, it helped me more than it hindered me.
The match I recall most after your alopecia set in was the one against Viktor Axelsen at the Sudirman Cup 2019. You lost in three close games. So you did manage to control your thoughts quite well even in the early phase of this condition?